Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Childhood fears never truly go away

When I was little I had a very....healthy imagination. Mostly this was a good thing, as it kept me entertained at school in ways that wouldn't get me in trouble. But it also led to a rather bizarre set of phobias, the most pervasive of which was this idea that somebody (or someTHING) was either:

a) Constantly behind me, just out of sight and always moving with me so I could never see it, waiting for the perfect opportunity to eviscerate me

or

b) Waiting in plain sight, seemingly innocuous and benign, sneaking closer and showing its true colors when I looked away, much like this cat, except more murderous and less adorable:

Option "a" was the more terrifying of the two, but each were among the regulars in my dreams. I called this creature "Snake Man" because his limbs were long and spindly, like snakes, and he tormented me mercilessly. Sitting in a chair watching TV? Better check over your shoulder every now and then; Snake Man might be behind you! Tall skinny old man at the supermarket? Not even the relative safety of Mom's grocery cart can save you from Snake Man!

Growing up and setting some boundaries between reality and make-believe has lessened Snake Man's effect over the years. In fact, I thought I was over him entirely. And then, today I stumbled across this:

I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL

Say hello to Slender Man. He first showed up on an internet forum about a year ago and has since worked his way into several urban legend-type websites, in addition to striking fear into the hearts of thousands via a series of YouTube videos. That picture is so close to how I imagined Snake Man that it's like someone broke into my subconscious and started taking photos. Part of me wants to find his creator(s) and congratulate them; the rest of me wants to punch them in the face for reminding me of the horror. I know he's fictional, the product of some talented Photoshoppers, but that image strikes a nerve so deep in me that no amount of logic can stop the fear. I'm 5 years old again, keeping doors shut and blinds closed in a vain attempt to keep out what is probably already in the house, watching and waiting.

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